Word Live: Submitting Together
Today’s reading is challenging. Pray that the Lord would help you see what these verses actually say, rather than what people sometimes claim or accuse them of saying.
Bible passage
Ephesians 5:21–33
Instructions for Christian households
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Saviour. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church – 30 for we are members of his body. 31 ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ 32 This is a profound mystery – but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Holy Bible, New International Version® Anglicized, NIV® Copyright © 1979, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
Explore
Verse 21 is crucial, introducing both this and tomorrow’s reading. Why must we get this straight first? Why is it to be done ‘out of reverence for Christ’? Take a moment to reflect on areas of your life where this is especially hard.
Verses 22–24. Notice that every instruction is given in terms of our relationship to Christ. This is the starting point. ‘Submit’ is a loaded word; isolated from the rest of Ephesians, the paragraph is crushing. But it is inseparable from verses 25–33. Perhaps it helps to see submission as simply ‘accepting leadership’. Any biblical role differences in life never imply differences in value. Paul never commands others to enforce submission (including a husband). The parallel of the church to Christ is instructive: the more we know him, the more it’s unthinkable we wouldn’t want his leadership.
Verses 25–33. This is truly radical. No Roman who considered wives to be possessions could ever have written it. If the wife’s job seems tough, check this out…
How does Paul alternate between marriage and church relationships here (see vs 28,29)? Despite the challenging roles both marriage partners have, how is their equality still clear?
Author
Mark Meynell
Respond
If married, focus on your own responsibilities. Pray for humility, grace and repentance. If not married, pray for the attitude in verse 21. And pray for marriages you know to shine Christ.
Deeper Bible study
‘God “made them male and female” “… A man will … be united to his wife and the two will become one” … what God has joined together, let no one separate.’1
We should all submit to each other, grateful that Christ made the ultimate submission (v 21). Paul only uses the verb once, so the sentence about wives is part of the wider context of Christian relationships. But it does say submit!2 Conservative readers say that if husbands led families there would be less divorce and social disorder. Liberals say that these texts are used to justify abuse of women and children. Moderates suggest that an authority structure is necessary in the family but using these verses to condone male supremacy abuses Scripture. These words were written when marriages were arranged, most women were illiterate and few had independent income. It is presumptuous that, 2,000 years later, we think we know more than they did about what was good and godly in first-century Christian families. Today, women are well educated, earn income, choose whom to marry and access contraception. Godly advice needs to be different for modern families where responsibilities are shared according to the partners’ different gifts and expertise.
What about the husbands? 2,000 years on, have we men also moved beyond this ‘outdated advice’? Do we no longer need to love our wives as Christ loved the church? Now that women are more independent, do we no longer need to give ourselves up for them (v 25)? Am I free at last to put my needs ahead of my wife’s and concentrate on cultivating myself? Deep within me, I know the answer. We men must still put the needs of our wives ahead of our own, trying and too often failing to be Christlike for them. For me, that includes not telling the women in my life, whom I love and respect, how they should interpret this text. But I can keep my own vow.
‘I … take thee … to my wedded wife, … for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part’.3
1 Mark 10:6–9 2Greek hypotassÅ, meaning submit, obey 3 Solemnisation of Matrimony, Book of Common Prayer
Author
John Harris
